Intro of the book about distorted ambition
- Distorted, abnormal ambition is born from the unusual dangerous moment
- that moment makes someone crazy to make up for its deficiency.
- As deficiency can be refilled, desire will be grown more and more.
- Sadly, from that moment on, maybe start to need to find victims for better success.
One Sentence Summary
You will fail everywhere if you can’t have your own things.
For Who?
- Those who couldn’t find their position in society whether that is a job or someone’s own work.
- Feels self-confidence and pride but practically feels empty. Like the people who feel by themselves not to accomplish anything.
- Those who had continuous discomfort with dreaming.
- Having a confidence to develop something as a new skill but worry about succeeding.
Why, when did I read about distorted ambition?
- There is a book titled [Emotion Class] by Shinju Kang, a very famous philosopher in Korea
- That is about a book that allocated each chapter of the book based on 48 types of emotions by Spinoza’s theory.
- In each chapter, one book is recommended as a proper book to explain a specific emotion in each chapter.
- Mo Yan’s book is recommended for a chapter [Ambition]
- When I read this book, I had a distance from social success.
- But I am working like multiplayer as a self-employed for the personal goal I’ve eager for.
- Felt very tough but I just thought there wasn’t any idea except for doing all the things together.
- I did that based on courage but that wasn’t enough to do only for that emotion.
- Spent several days without doing anything because of heavy fear.
- Or, sometimes felt scared because of the thinking I can’t give up.
- As my will for accomplishing was strong, as my fear got bigger, the word [ambition] became attractive to me.
- I read that book despite I didn’t read Maupassant’s book at all before.
Where is the feeling about distored ambition to you?
- Couldn’t take my eyes off from hero’s decision.
- Especially a self-deception for hypnotizing himself that every accomplishment was gotten from his own effort.
- Even though, that was just using other people near of him as a tool.
- The scene of deceiving himself was recalled on and on as he got fame continuously.
- The repeated moment occurred when he got love from the next woman and discard it after finished to get benefits.
- He headed for bigger success instead of giving fake love, but that success was endless even though he stepped in many people.
- He didn’t have an idea to stop in the middle of heading his success despite he got so many accomplishments.
- That looks like the end of distorted ambition.
- In the last part of the book, already there wasn’t any love or sincerity-like values in him.
- I thought he also knew about the importance of relationships and people near him.
- But he thought his own success was much more important than genuine love.
- He knew the tragedy called poverty, so he didn’t hesitate to use people as his tool.
- I didn’t live like him. I won’t do that.
- However, I don’t know why but I thought he was a mirror of my self-esteem.
- Totally different situation and character but I couldn’t remove the feeling I was alike him.
What did you see in distored ambition-related book?
- There is a way only that person can walk even though there is looked like complete fog.
- Fortune could occur once or twice, but that is the end. Another one can’t walk that way instead of you.
- Sadly, like a hero in this book, we can use someone as a tool.
- However, at least, he knew that well he used someone for his own intention and goal.
- At that point, he can have self-pride at all. Only a pretending attitude for faking that is a success by his own effort.
- That fake will be returned to him someday definitely.
- Sometimes he tried to eat a proper amount to edit his bad habit by himself.
- However, we need a minimum level of social environment for social success.
- Strong will, and a great heart can be destroyed in a thoroughly poor environment.
- So, we should try to make a safe place to keep challenging our goal in advance of the situation just told fake is bad.
- A desire for success is a very strong emotion.
- Especially, as you feel a deficiency by recognizing your poor aspects strongly, You may hard to move away from there.
- We need to see what happened to other people who showed too much behavior under a specific circumstance.
- We can communicate with each other when we try hard to get in an effort to understand other people’s thinking as their position.
- Sometimes it doesn’t good for judging easily without understanding background history.
- With this sort of effort, we can be balanced people by watching ourselves objectively.
- But sometimes, I feel suspect my approach and think is right.
- Worry of the case when I get age so much before I grabbed my goal.
- Honestly, I can’t say this kind of preach-like message if I can’t make my clear track record.
- So, actually, I think I also need more time to confirm this matter deeply as time goes on later.
Re-definition of distorted ambition after reading a book
- The original definition of drinking desire in the book: Humanistic, so humanistic weakness
- 18th Apr 2020. (After reading this chapter, re-definition): It was just my mirror.